"Never Let Your Emotions Take Hold"

Today I feel...

How in the heck do people do that?! I am seriously the MOST emotionally ridiculous human being (or...I guess I should say GIRL) in the entire world! Seriously, I am so damn sensititve about every little thing and it is so ANNOYING!

I have no idea how I got to be this way, I'd like to think it's because I was so spoiled as a kid that hearing "no" or anything negative automatically triggers something in my tear ducts that just make them start flowing. Either way, however I got to be this way, I need to find a reverse button STAT!

The other day was not one of my best ones and my mood (unfortunately) was not very well hidden, S kept asking me what was wrong and I was so ready to just spill it all...
-Scared about my move
-Frustrating days at work
-Money stressing me out
-Managing and organizing my life...
etc.
I was so ready to just let it all spill, just get it out, I know he would be so understanding and just listen to me and then finally let me know everything would okay, but I just couldn't say anything! Everytime I went to open my mouth I could feel the tears stinging my eyes just ready to come pouring out for NO REASON. It's not that big of a deal, I mean literally the next day or even hours later I was laughing at myself for being so ridiculous, but my emotions always get the better of me and it keeps me from talking about it because I don't want to cry (like an idiot, I mean seriously, grow up and start acting 22!)

My dad says it's my most annoying quality and it is. I'm too. damn. sensitive!!!!!!

I never really stand up for myself either (when it comes to people that I'm not very close with, to those I am close with I guess I could be seen as bossy at times **cough cough Shawn**) ;). If someone asks me to do something, even if it is the most inconvenient thing for me, I always say yes, I just can't say no and then it ends up stressing me out, over the littlest things. I mean, I'm no pushover (most of the time) but it really is ridiculous how much I say yes when really I should be saying "No I don't want to walk around and ask everyone what their birthdays are, I actually have my own work to do" or "Maybe you'd have time for this and not have to ask me to do it because you have 'so much to do' if you didn't spend 4 hours a day gossiping with people in your office".

Sometimes in my office I literally feel like this guy:

Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful for my job, the fact that I even have one when so many people out there are struggling, but I just wish I knew how to say "no" every once in a while.

I feel like most of the time I say yes just to avoid the whole overflow of emotions kind of thing...because I feel like if I say no there will be conflict, conflict leads to anxiety, anxiety leads to...tears...UGH! Grow up Kristen!

Okay **deep breath** I am done with my rant! I actually have a really GREAT life and I am SO happy with where I am right now and wouldn't change a thing...except for maybe this darn emotions ;)

Move in went really well and we're all still getting adjusted and trying to figure out how and where to get all of our furniture, once it's done I'll post pictures, and don't worry we're having a house warming party so bring us bottles of wine ;)