Passion

passion(noun): enthusiasm, eagerness, zeal, zealousness, vigor, fire, fieriness, energy, fervency, animation, spirit, spiritedness, fanaticism. ANTONYMS apathy.

Disclaimer: I am a very lucky girl, very lucky. I have a great job, get paid fairly well, flexible boss that lets me take off when I need to and come in and leave when I need to.

That being said, lately I have really HATED going to and being at work. Things have gotten so busy lately and there is so much to do that sometimes it's really hard to find any kind of enjoyment in what I'm doing. This has really got me thinking a lot lately about my passions. 

What am I passionate about??? 

uhh...think Kristen...umm...photography? Well not really, it's just kind of a new hobby I'm starting. Cooking? Not a passion, again just a hobby...crap...I have NO idea. I should know this right?! I'm a 23 year old girl with the world at my finger tips, I could be doing anything I want. But I have ZERO idea of what that is. 

Examples of people with passions-

1) My mom: Growing up my mom always cooked for us, breakfast, made our lunches, after school snacks, dinner, etc. But she was always so busy taking care of 5 kids that I don't think she really got to enjoy cooking that much. Then once life got a little less busy, all of a sudden she was a cooking machine! She is amazing at it, the best (right along with my dad). She goes to cooking classes, is obsessed with Hubble & Hudson (as am I!!), reads cooking magazines, watches the Food Network and she is never afraid to try any recipe and it works. This is her passion. She's dying to go to Italy (mostly for food reasons) and it really made me think. If she had figured this out a long time ago (like maybe when she was my age) her life would have been a lot different. Maybe she would have gone to Italy and explored before she started having kids, maybe she would have gone to school to learn to cook or opened a restaurant. (This is an example of a later in life passion discovery)

2) My brother: Tony is so passionate about the Marine Corps. He tried to get out but found himself going right back in. It's what he loves. It's what he lives for. (That and working out, skinny jerk) ;) This is his passion, what he will be doing for as long as he can.

3) Shawn's cousin: So passionate about sports, ask him anything about anyone, anywhere and he can tell you every little detail. He knows his stuff. He's passionate about it, this will be his career.

4) Shawn's sister: She is an AMAZING photographer, she's done the training and she even does this for a living. She turned her passion into her career and lives it every single day.

I know so many more people like this.

I am so envious of them. 

Before I worked at my current job I really enjoyed the job I was at. I liked the interaction with people, learning about the law, I loved working in the same place as my dad. But it wasn't my passion and I knew it wouldn't last forever. 

Can you imagine, going to work everyday and LOVING what you do. 

Counting your blessings all the time and never second guessing the decision you made.

I want this.

So Shawn and I were talking about this yesterday. I brought up how I wasn't looking forward to going to work and how I needed to find something that would get me excited every day. Honestly, (and this is so roll-your-eyes-cliche) if I could do anything in the world, something that I think would make me really happy, it would be to be a full time mom and wife or a teacher of some sort. Now, obviously I've never experienced this (family of my own thing) so how would I know for sure, but I love taking care of Shawn, everything about it. I love cooking for him, cleaning for him, doing his laundry, etc. (He does a lot of that for me too- just giving you some credit too, boo!)

So after our little phone conversation I texted him this: 

(I hope he won't mind me sharing this)

Me: Can kids be a passion? Maybe when the teaching opportunities get a little better I'll get certified to teach. I'd make no money but I think I'd really like it!

Shawn: Do it! I was just thinking the same thing. Maybe our passion is family!

One of my favorite things he's ever said. 

I'll take it.

If family is my passion, I think, what could be any better than that?

I can't wait for the day when I have little ones to take care of and I have a family to be proud of.

A lot of woman fight to get people out of this frame of mind but really, that's what I dream of doing. 

Now whether this is considered a passion, I'm not 100% sure. I had a nannying job once taking care of two year old twin boys and it was SO FUN!! I loved it. But aside from that and some babysitting gigs that's about all the experience I have. Little kids love me and always want to be around me, so maybe that's the universe's way of telling me that's where I'm supposed to be.

Or maybe my current job will become my passion or lead me to mine. I just need a few more years under my belt. I just don't want to wake up one day and be 30 years older and realize that I've never truly enjoyed what I've done. 

People always say: Live life to the fullest!

And even though I don't exactly know what my definition of living life to the fullest is yet, I hope that you'll start thinking about what that means to you and maybe get your life started.

Especially if you're still in college. Oh how I wish I had done some things differently (But then my life would have turned out differently and I love the direction it's going)

Try to find something you love.

And if you don't know what it is yet...well I guess the first step is just loving the life we have now. 

Tomorrow is another day

We can choose to change things at any time.

As cliche as that is, it's so true. 

Find your passion.